People come and go. I guess this statement is already a cliche and a reality. I once read that our life is like a train. Along the way, we meet people. We become friends. But there are those who just have to stay for one or two stations because they are meant to stop on that specific place. There are some who can be with us for a longer period of time, but only few will be with us until the last stop. When I read this, it makes me realize the truth in it. Indeed, we can never be assured of any relationship in this world. For in the end, the only one that will last is our relationship with God. However, those people that we meet along the way are not just a mere ornaments. They have a purpose. Moreover, they are intended to either teach us a lesson or give us a new perspective. Whatever it is, God allows that person to walk in our life.
Sometimes, God takes something to remind us that He alone is enough. Perhaps, in your life God has taken your material blessings or your success away from you to let you realize that these things do not matter in the end. Like Job, we suffer loss of great possessions to test our faith. But I guess the hardest part is when God takes someone away from us. An old proverb says that “You (God) can take anything from me but not her (him),” best illustrate the gravity of the pain of losing someone we loved or treasured.
Why does God take someone away from us? There might be many reasons but based on experience, I have three things in mind.
1. That someone causes us to form an “idol” and be stagnant.As a Christian, God did not save us to stay in the place where He found us. We need to grow and mature each day. However, there are times that we become stagnant because of some people or someone. It maybe that we become so dependent on that person and that person is becoming our “idol.” That person is in the pedestal of our hearts instead of God. We know that God is a jealous God. As an individual, we cannot put our total dependence on people nor happiness on someone.
God knew that Abraham’s love towards his son Isaac needs to be purified and that He tested Abraham to let go of his son. And he proved to God that he loved God more than anyone else. Interestingly, the Lord gave Isaac back to Abraham when He had proved the purity of his love towards Him.
When I was younger, I also had that same experience. It hurts a lot. But God has healed my heart. Though I cried a river, I had moved on because I have also proved God’s love for me. It made me realized that God alone is enough.
When that someone causes our spiritual life to be still and our happiness revolves around him (her), then God needs to take him (her) away from us. Anything that holds the best place in our hearts has the tendency to be our idol which God abhors. There are times when that person will come back (like the story of Isaac and Abraham) but sometimes, that person will be gone from our presence forever. Sometimes, God will not bring that person back but He will replace that person to help and compliment in our Christian journey. Nonetheless, it brings us a precious lesson that only God will stay forever.
2. We hurt that someone and we reap the consequence. This is sad. Most of the time, we realize the importance of that person (or people) when he or she already walks away from us.Probably, you might be thinking that this is usual in the lives of unbelievers. Yet, Christians are not exempted from this. Frail as we are, there are moments of selfishness and carnality that we experience. Many times, because of our selfish desires, we push people away. The only cure for this is to die to ourselves. Let nothing be done out of selfishness. Instead, esteem others more than ourselves (Philippians 2:3). Forgive more. Save the relationship and forget our pride.Losing someone is hard especially when we know that we are able to keep him (her).
I have lost a lot of people in my life because of my selfishness. I felt that those people took a piece of my heart away that I could not be the same again. But God is good. He gave me new friends and Christian families whom I can lean on and who can come along side my journey with God. They brought me lessons that I could not forget. My heart is glad though that those lessons that I had, I am able to grow stronger in my relationships with others during this time.
3. God takes that someone in Heaven. No earthly relationship lasts forever and death is an uninvited visitor that surely come to everyone. This might probably be the most painful separation from someone we love. We do not have any control over it. We grieve. We feel sorrowful and sad. However, what we need to be assured of is that person dies with Jesus Christ in His heart. That will be our comfort – that one day, that loved one will be walking in Heaven with us. As of that moment, we learn to find our comfort and peace in God.
Relationship is the most difficult thing to handle. As humans, we love, treasure, and develop affection towards people. But pain and hurt won’t separate those that we feel. The good thing is that the Bible speaks wisdom on how we ought to build our relationship with others.
Those years that God took people in my life, I have learned that love and forgiveness are the two secret ingredients of building a healthy relationship with people. We cannot forgive without loving. We cannot love without forgiving. So if we have these two, we can be assured that by God’s grace, we will develop good friendships and relationships with others. The book of 1 Corinthians chapter 13 speaks about how we ought to love.
And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity (v13). If we are Christians, our earthly relations with our fellows will be eternal. Choose to love. Choose to forgive.
People come and go. But each of them will give and leave us something to learn and treasure. Some may teach us to be stronger. Perhaps, they will teach us to love and treasure people more. Or maybe God is teaching us that no man can be with us through all the seasons but Him.
I do not know about you but I am sure that there is something that is left within you when God takes someone away from you.
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